As I walk the streets of Paris, listening to the amazing metronomy remix of goldfrapp’s happiness which has vocals from the teenagers, basically it is a happy song remixed by one of brighton’s best and then a spoken french vocal on top. The story of the song is about the narrator who meets a girl in Nottingham, falls in love with her and it doesn’t work out. The special bits are in the details such as how she said she worked in fashion but is just an accountant for tk maxx, how they went to see a german film and it was horrible. The song is also a handy tool to use when trying to learn the imparfait tense in french. This song was my aide to get home drunk as I usually trying to walk home after a night out. All at the same time, in the song, this amazing shuffle beat is playing and the story is broken up by the original song which has the line “that time stops when you have lost love”. And that’s the point I want to get to. I cant help it but I am a hopeless romantic. I have tried to be an asshole player type guy and it just isn’t worth it. To be honest I used to be ashamed by it. I try to model myself of james bond for christs sake and then I spend the rest of my time being a puss in boots. That’s the thing there isn’t any shame in being it. The thing is that the fall is much greater if I was an asshole than me being myself. The past couple of weeks have been an enlightenment period in the sense that I was willing to put up with so much just be close to someone. The reality is and this is a simple one, don’t bother about it unless you are sure that the person is feeling the same way. Otherwise mate and I don’t say this to be an ass jog on. I don’t like the phrase it is better to have loved and lost. No its stupid, nostalgia just fucking confuses you even more. It was nostalgia that makes you hark back to when times where good. The word by definition doesn’t include the bad times. That’s why the beatles are really popular its simple to hit the sweet moments in life. And why songs like blackbird and tomorrow never knows don’t resonate as much. That’s why the kooks are shit even if they don’t know that they are shit. That last sentence didn’t mean anything. Just that I loathe the kooks. I managed to create a situation in my head that a lack of motion was a good thing. It equally meant that I wasn’t fucking up but also not going anywhere and for a while I convinced myself that was how it should be. Yes Common, his next album is going to fail, might have said slow motion is better than no motion but I think that referred to the struggles of the urban youth in America than me and the woman I loved. The simple fact remains I will still love her but I just cant express it. It got to the point that I didn’t know what was going on in my mind. Questioning whether or not people like you is odd when you know fairly well that you are a nice person. If you want and like different things in life maybe variety isn’t what you need. I saw a Mexican couple on the metro this afternoon and I have to say it was sad to see them arguing. Their child sat there soaking in this malcontent and wondering why the two people that are role models in her life didn’t bother hiding their anger. Why bother staying together, I guess I didn’t see the whole story but it just pains me to see it. My favourite band DFA 1979 borke up after one album and two ep’s. the reason why they broke up was the just fell out of touch. The quote is this:
“had grown apart to such an extent that the only real time we spoke was just before we would play and during interviews. we both changed so much that the people we were by the end of it, probably wouldnt have been friends if they were to meet for the first time again. its a totally normal function of growing up. like how your high school bf/gf that meant so much to you would probably be the last person you would date at 30, ya know? thats where we got to. its not sad.”
Stealing a line from heat “ don’t get attached to something you cant walk away from in less than 3 minutes.” My opinion is don’t get attached to something that isn’t going anywhere soon. That applies to fads, shoes and sex in the city. You could miss out on your youth.*

* I saw justice, went to many gigs, met many people, ate a ton of sushi, slept in airports and met Teki Latex. I’ve had what you would call a good run. I cant complain as I have some of my time left here.
** picture by Mate , doing the running back and forth on the metro game for the record i beat allie easily.